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Post by Fredrex00 on Nov 8, 2008 23:11:04 GMT -5
Pretty good chapter. I like how Devon's appearance and existence within the Evangelion world isn't just affecting the world itself, but the actions, reactions, and personalities of the characters within. Maybe we'll see a different way that the Instrumentally Project goes down? I do agree with Talon that Rei and Shinji need a bit more screen time. Than and I think Shinji needs to take charge and complete some battles on his own (excluding the previous fights). But hey, that's just my thought. Can't wait for the next chapter!
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Post by shdwdrgn on Dec 10, 2008 21:39:23 GMT -5
Wonderful bit of writing Azure. I do have to agree that Rei is being benched quite a bit even though she is a quiet person. just give her a little more developement and your story is spot on.
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Post by Azure_Ghidorah on Dec 17, 2008 18:24:47 GMT -5
I regret to say that this chapter is rather short compared to my most recent ones. The Matariel episode wasn't exactly heavily focused on the Children. However, I do believe that I've managed to pull off at least a decent chapter. Of course, because of how I changed the battle, Rei didn't get to do much of... well... anything in it. She mostly just got us to the battle and then stepped aside.
Comments are appreciated as always.
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Post by shdwdrgn on Dec 17, 2008 20:00:58 GMT -5
A wonderful chapter Azure. Nice to see Rei get some of that much needed attention. Better keep a filter on that mouth of yours if you want to stay on Azuka's good side(if she really has one). Overall it was one of the best and well balanced chapters you've written to date. Looking forward to Ch. 10.
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Post by Talon on Dec 17, 2008 21:58:05 GMT -5
FINAAAALLHEEEEYYY!!! *brick'd*
*cough* Anyway, loved this chapter! Not much action, but hey, that's Matariel for yah. What struck me most was the dialogue in this one- I really liked it! Moreso than some of the dialogue in past chapters! Methinks you gettin' better...
*goes to look up which Angel is after Matariel cuz he can't remember*
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Post by Azure_Ghidorah on Jan 1, 2009 6:11:33 GMT -5
Chapter Ten is here, and I'm sure I've satisfied the need for Rei development at the end of this for now.
Sahaquiel felt rather difficult to write, after all, it's just a bomb... not much you can do with that... -_-'
Anyways, things are beginning to spin out of Gendo's control... and he doesn't even know it... I love how evil I'm being right now.
>.< I dread the next chapter though...
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Post by Talon on Jan 1, 2009 14:36:42 GMT -5
This was a good chapter, despite your difficulties with it (I had trouble seeing any, really...), and yes! I like the fact you're developing Rei more now!
goddamnit, I need to hurry up 'n watch EoE... >.>
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Post by shdwdrgn on Jan 1, 2009 21:12:49 GMT -5
Yes its nice to see Rei get some of the same attention Shinji and Asuka got. At this rate the entire cast will be quite nice when we wind down to the end. Must... order... EoE... before... we get... much farther.
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Post by Azure_Ghidorah on Feb 3, 2009 1:13:58 GMT -5
After much procrastination, I finish the shortest chapter in the story...
Pity me, for what happens in said chapter.
I apologize for how short this was, but there was so little I could do...
I WILL REDEEM MYSELF THOUGH! JUST. YOU. WAIT!
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Post by Talon on Feb 3, 2009 19:35:39 GMT -5
Mmrph. Shorter than I expected, but eh, not much you could've done with Iruel... unless you pulled a Bardiel with the test bodies. >.>
And something tells me Iruel isn't really dead...
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Post by Azure_Ghidorah on Jul 11, 2009 23:59:54 GMT -5
This is not dead yet.
Forgive the immense pause in between chapters, Writer's Block nailed me hard and in many forms.
Hopefully, I'll be able to get my ass back in gear now.
Sorry about no Leliel, but I refuse to do an Angel fight without the aftermath, and this chapter would have gotten too outta hand. That, and I feel there was too much plot before the 12th Angel, and it didn't feel right to tack the fight on at the end.
Comments and criticism, please.
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